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Blog 7

Original:

Effective Altruism has this idea of replaceability. In that if you are doing something, and somebody else could come along and do just as good a job as you are doing, then it isn’t good enough. You need to be better and do better than anybody else in your position could have. If you are irreplaceable then you are doing good by their definition. “In equation form, Your Apparent Good Achieved minus the Good Your Counterfactual Replacement Would Have Achieved equals Your Actual Good Achieved” (Southan). I don’t agree with this idea of replaceability. I believe that if somebody is doing good then it doesn’t matter that somebody else can do it just as good or better than them, the point is that the good deed was done, and Haas and Hahn exhibit this point well.

 

Revised:

Effective Altruism has this idea of replaceability. If you are doing a good deed that somebody else could be doing just as good a job as you are doing, then it isn’t good enough. To be irreplaceable you have to do better than anybody else could have. “In equation form, Your Apparent Good Achieved minus the Good Your Counterfactual Replacement Would Have Achieved equals Your Actual Good Achieved” (Southan). If you are irreplaceable then you are doing good by their definition/equation. I don’t agree with this idea of replaceability. I believe that if somebody is doing good then it doesn’t matter that somebody else can do it just as good or better than them, the point is that the good deed was done, and Haas and Hahn exhibit this point well.

 

Original:

Now this complicates things, because most artists aren’t going on to the front lines helping people who need us the most. However, most artists can go the front lines and document what is happening, especially in areas that aren’t being helped yet. Artists can go to a different country, spend time with the people there, and expose the rest of the world to what is going on, and how those people specifically need help. Some people don’t have the ability to ‘save the drowning child’, but they can ‘shout and send help’. Artists take pictures or paint paintings of horrific things that are happening in this world and advertise it to people. If they can show what is happening to a large amount of people, then those people collectively can help those people that are in need. They can also help create groups to get the attention of the government or people in charge to be able to make change on a large scale.

 

Revised:

Now this complicates things, because most artists aren’t going to the front lines helping people who need us the most. However, most artists can go the front lines and document what is happening, especially in areas that aren’t being helped yet. Artists can go to a different country, spend time with the people there, and expose the rest of the world to what is going on, and how the people in need specifically need help. Some people don’t have the ability to ‘save the drowning child’, but artists can ‘shout and send help’. Artists take pictures or paint paintings of horrific things that are happening in this world and advertise it to the public. If they can show what is happening to the general public, then everybody collectively can help those people that are in need. They can also help create groups to get the attention of the government or people in charge to be able to make change on a large scale.

 

Overall the changes that I’ve made were to help clarify the sentences that I had already written. Because what I had written was confusing and not clearly defined. The sections from the reading were the defining section, classifying, and the repetition section.

1 Comment

  1. elishaemerson

    3/3

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